As soon as I started this blog, I started reading more blogs online- just to see what others write about, etc. You know, I would start out on one blog that I am already familiar with, and then link to others from that blog if something caught my interest. There are some VERY good writers out there. So this is only my second post because I find myself thinking things like:
I'm not a very good writer; I am not that witty/creative/etc.
I don't have anything interesting to write about
No one is going to care about my family's daily ups and downs
And so thanks to my mini-anxiety attack, the thing that was supposed to be a nice little outlet for me and possibly a way to connect with others has become totally intimidating. Ugh!
Then I figured, since I already feel inferior and not "blog worthy", I am just going to post anyway and focus on doing this for me and for the sake of remembering and cherishing the little events of everyday life in our family.
That being said, we had my great-nephew (that's right, I am 34 and have a great-nephew) stay with us overnight on Saturday. My niece and her husband are preparing to move within the next week (unexpectedly) so we offered to watch Ben to give them some uninterrupted packing time. Ben is a great little guy. Ben and Michael are less than 3 months apart and they get along well. Liam managed to hold his own too. This is the second time we had Ben overnight and once again it showed me the very, very critical difference between having 2 children and having 3 children. On a day-to-day basis, I have found ways to get things done, keep the house somewhat together, work part-time and still have a few minutes to myself each day. Mike and I often talk about having a 3rd child but after this past weekend, I think that it might send me over the edge! I suppose it is all in what you are accustomed to but I was COMPLETELY exhausted by the time Ben left on Sunday afternoon. And I had help from my husband and my parents! And Ben is a good kid! How the heck would I manage 3 little ones all the time?
At this point, our strained financial situation is stopping us from even attempting to expand our family but if money wasn't an issue, could we handle it? More specifically, could I handle it? Of course, when you have your own, you go through each phase and the baby doesn't come out a walking/running/chattering 22 month old. But when I think of the crazy newborn schedule, it still seems like it would be a huge adjustment. I know many, many people have larger families but I still wonder if I could handle it. In my heart, I feel like we are meant to have at least one more child but the more practical considerations are holding us back. If we can get our finances on track, then we may take that plunge again!
This is a long post but I am making up for lost time. One idea I recently read was to answer the following "One year ago...one year from now...". Here is my version:
One year ago we were figuring out life with an almost 14 month old and an almost 2 month old. We took our first family vacation with my parents to Ocean City, Maryland. I was trying to figure out what to do about a job. It was hectic and stressful but Michael and Liam made it worth every minute!!
One year from now, I hope that Michael and Liam are as happy as they are today. I hope that Mike's career path becomes clear and that he finds success. I hope that we ready to add to our family (despite my worries!). I hope that our finances are in a better place.
On that note, good night!
No comments:
Post a Comment