Lest you get the idea that I am all happy-go-lucky about this working thing, let me clear up any false impressions. The external things are going find: the daily routine related stuff is getting there and the kids are enjoying their "school" experience and I do like my new job, BUT I'm just not feeling it.
I am not going to go off the deep end and quit tomorrow or anything drastic. But yeah, I could very easily just go right back to our previous life and probably have a new found appreciation for it. I think I might LOVE to go back to that life.
If only there were a happy medium where I could work, say, 3 days of the week. That would be great!! I would SO love that. I could bring in a steady income without spending so much time outside of my home, away from my boys.
I can't even think too much about how MUCH I miss them each day.
And I know that they miss me too...and that makes me miss them even more.
I can still manage a positive for you:
I am THANKFUL that the holidays are upon us and that means that next week I have a 2-day work next week and the week after is the same...then it's back to the regular grind.
3 comments:
I'm sorry you're "not feelin' it". It sucks that you have to choose the path you don't want. It reminds me to be more grateful of the life I live...even when the little things annoy me. ;)
Do you think you'll feel better once that first paycheck comes in? Maybe an ease in financial worries will make you feel a lot better about this decision? It's really fantastic that you can contribute to the family cause. I'm not sure what kind of job I could get that would pay for daycare for 3 kids and still contribute to the family finances. I think I would be pretty stuck here until at least one of them was in school all day. ;)
I cannot count how many times I've said that EXACT thing about part-time work. It is ideal for family life, but not ideal in any other way (salary, lack of benefits). Boo. Hang in there sister.
On the Christmas card thing, can you send me one? PLEASE? Even though I RAN OUT OF CARDS this year. I'm so mad at myself for not ordering more. But if we exchange addresses then I promise you'll be on our mailing list for next year.
It's very tricky, that's for sure, especially with little ones. I did it on my own for a while. . .not easy!!! I hope you and your family will adjust soon.
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