Okay, so the only reason for that post title is because something awesome happened this afternoon.
The daycare director at my new job stopped by to tell me...drum roll please...
MICHAEL & LIAM CAN GO THERE!! I am very excited that this worked out because while I was hopeful, I wasn't counting on it. So we need to work out the details but by next Tuesday, they will be in the swing of things. I am introducing the idea to the boys so they are not blindsided and they will visit this week to break the ice.
Other than that, I felt strange today. Aside from trying to learn the ins and outs of this new job, my mind was in a fog. I wasn't weepy or anything but I don't feel like myself. I made it through the day, it was fine but I am still lacking that spark of excitement that I would like to have.
When I got home, the boys were thrilled to see me. Michael was his usual self, happy to see me but nothing out of the ordinary yet. My little Liam, well, he hugged and hugged me...and sat on my lap for about 15 minutes, putting his head on my shoulder and just being a little lovey bear. No tears but wow, he broke my heart with all that cuddling...like he was making up for lost time!
It was the best and worst part of my day.
All the signs are there that this is a GOOD thing, that this job is going to WORK...the opportunity, the timing, the salary, and now the daycare coming through is just the perfection of it all. What is wrong with me? Why can't I see this for what it is?
Oh, just keep praying for me and please don't think I am too much of a baby for my lack of ability to cope with this change.
2 comments:
I'm glad things are looking good. Now you just have to give your emotions time to catch up. First weeks (or months) are so hard...you'll get there.
YAY! I'm so happy the daycare will work out!
You are being WAY too hard on yourself. This IS a good thing, like you say, but it comes with a price. That isn't lost on you. You're handling things tremendously well. This is one of the biggest changes for a family, and you shouldn't feel like you have to slight that. Keep reminding yourself of those good things, which is something you're so good at doing, and you'll be fine. So will your boys.
*hugs*
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